It’s not controversial to say this year has been an exceptionally difficult one. Who could possibly have imagined this time last December that 2020 would pan out in the way it did? But that’s the way with all unforeseen events, you don’t see them coming, and they can change your life beyond what you would have imagined possible.
I’ve been thinking this week about how we all respond to and prepare for the unexpected crises which occur in any life. I have experienced sudden, unforeseen and devastating events, and I know many of you have as well. You never think it will happen to you, but sometimes it does.
There’s no real way to prepare for these crises, and the last thing I would advise anyone to do would be to spend time and energy worrying about something which has not yet and may never happen. Imagining the worst scenarios and worrying about them will not be any use to anyone.
That said, there is one thing that most unforeseen events have in common: they let you know who your friends are. Time and again I have been astounded by the help and support offered to me by friends, family and acquaintances during a time of crisis. Often, as the saying goes, it may be the people you least expect who come out of the woodwork to help get you through a difficult moment.
I try and remember this support from friends and family throughout normal, non-crisis times, and put a little extra effort in when I can to maintain those connections and friendships, knowing I can count on these people if I need to one day, and that they can count on me. It’s a useful thing to remember as well whenever a petty disagreement or moment of tension crops up, as it puts these into perspective. It also reminds me to spend time on the people who matter, rather than wasting energy on any negative or antagonistic encounters.
2020 has been a tough year for everyone, and there's no getting away from that. But there have been some silver livings - more emphasis on getting outside and spending time in nature, for example. One good thing I'll take away from 2020 is an increased awareness of the importance of friendships and community. So many months of not being able to see loved ones in person has been very difficult, but it has shown us just how important those loved ones are.
If there are any lessons I'll be thinking about in 2021, it will be to keep my friends and family close – metaphorically, even if we still have a little whole to wait before we can be close to everyone we want to see in person.